This story is to show how a some people can leave the Homeless community with by being housed but will not let go of the mentality. I have two friends that came from this comunity and both are living in their on place. There are certain rules in the Homeless community that can not be broken because it can be considered disrespectful. I lost one friend over some delicious meat because I broke an unspoken rule from that community.
I will start with my closest friend, who will be called Will for this story. Will and I have been friends for about 4 years. He is Gay, is employed, and pays his own rent. Will and I have a mutual sharing relationship. Whoever has more money pays and the other will catchup whenever. He loves to eat so he is always trying to feed me, not just fast food but the best that he would eat. Will works a lot and doesn't spend the quality time like we used to. Sometimes I see him once a week but we always have fun.
My other friend we will call Joe. Joe and I ha known each other about 3 years but never really talked much until the last couple of months. He has his own place but hustles for money and he doesn't pay rent. He makes just enough for his habits per day a fast food meal. Don't get me wrong he can make a good amount if it was routine but he is content with the minimal. We became close too fast, but that was ok with me because he has intelligent conversations most of the time. Joe pays for me when I participate with his activities and/or a little food here and there.
I had started spending a lot of time with Joe, almost daily so I decided I would take the weekend off. I left him Friday afternoon to shower and get myself back on track. Will called after he got off work and wanted to meet up. I found out that he was bringing meat to eat. It was smoked and still warm. I bought dessert and we started the night. He left his food to help a friend but when he returned he was too tired to eat so he went home. Joe continuously called and texted all night. Normally Will doesn't like to reheat the meat so I was thinking about giving it to Joe.
The next day mentioned it to Joe that I might bring the meat, but his response was,"call when you are leaving". I agreed but after he hung up someone came over. I then realized my phone was gone. I contacted Joe online, told him about phone and not wait on me plus Will contacted me and might want his meat. That's when the stuff hit the fan. Joe started talking about the third time and I should just be with Will. He went on for a while. This is still all online msgs. Joe mentioned that if I gave it to him it can't be Will's and I'm taking it back now. Keep in mind that I said I was thinking about it plus I hadn't left home. He ended with, "I don't want to see you. Please throw away anything you have of mine".
The Homeless community unspoken rule is if you offer something to someone you can't give it to someone else. In this case, I had explained the circumstances prior to mentioning the though. It should have been clear that there was a possibility that I might return, but it was unlikely. It should have also been clear that I was taking a break so there was a possibility I might not visit. Unfortunately, all Joe thought if was that he wanted the meat and I deprived him of his right. It is said that a person who could provide his own meat would rather sever a relationship than consider that talk about the misunderstanding. I believe that the environment and community of the Homeless warrants a certain mentality to survive. Some people accept it a means to an end, so that when they leave they can leave it behind. Unfortunately, some people accept it as a way of life and believes that it will also work in regular societies. Please consider this when you think of the Homeless community.
Comments
Post a Comment